A Dolphin Named Richard
by TheNutcase
Summary: LA is hot. Very, very hot. Especially in the summer, and especially to people who aren't used to it. Sam isn't used to it. She's also a bit hungry. Enter Cat, with her faulty air conditioner and her being all confusing and making Sam feel things that just don't make sense. Yes, Sam is irritated, but she just can't stay mad. Not at Cat. And she can't say no to her, either.
1. The Heat

Summer in LA is brutal. Not the good kind of brutal, either; the type that I can't get any enjoyment out of at all. I may have been able to from a safe distance, but I have to suffer through it with the Californians this time - and no, I'm not exactly happy about it.

Up in Seattle it was always tolerable in the summer. Further away from the equator I guess. And it rains more. A lot more. So even when it was hot it wasn't all dry and irritating. I wasn't planning on being this far down when summer started, see - I thought by now I would have headed east and north or something. Up towards like. New England.

But Cat kind of stopped that - I didn't really get very far by the time I met her, and I can't exactly be mad at her for it. She's just so… innocent. And it's nice, anyway, to have a home… I know it's not like me to admit it, but it does make me feel a bit more stable. And safe. Don't get me wrong here, I would make out fine without one - I could wander the country for as long as I needed to. I'm a fighter.

I would have, too. Would have just kept going if I hadn't met her. I don't know how I feel about it - because, well, I don't really want to think about what would have happened had I not stopped to get a burrito, or seen her drive by on that pink (ew) bike of hers with the bright smile and striking eyes. Had to look at her, then, and watch her - my eyes wouldn't cooperate and look away. And had I not noticed her in the trash? Had I not saved her from the truck?

It makes me sick to think about it.

When it crosses my mind, though, I'm happy that I can just look at her for a bit to remind myself that she's alright. That she will be alright. That I protected her - perhaps even _saved_ her. It's sappy and I hate it but the thought of it makes me smile a bit. And I get this… feeling. Like an adrenaline rush. Or some kind of fluttering in my stomach.

Probably just indigestion.

"Sam?" she calls out to me. I snap out of my trance and realize I've been staring. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

I coughed and my eyes probably darted around. I might have blushed a little tiny bit, but then I remembered that I'm Sam Puckett. And Sam Puckett doesn't blush.

My eyes landed on a bagel on the counter next to where she was looking at me curiously, just having poured herself some fruit punch. "Um…," I started lamely. "I was just… looking at that… bagel." I cleared my throat awkwardly and wished I was able to face-palm without her finding it strange. (Then again, not much is really _strange _to Cat.)

Cat shrugged a bit, picking up her fruit punch and swallowing a gulp of it - but I saw the edges of her lips tilt up in a little smile, and her eyes twinkle the way they do when she knows something I refuse to tell her (or admit to myself, for that matter). That feeling came back because she didn't break our eye contact, and this time I _knew_ I was about to blush so I turned my head to the right quickly to hide it.

The conversation died out and I looked at the TV to distract myself, but really I was just blankly staring at it. I had to catch myself and look back every time my eyes began to stray in her direction. I owned my spaciness up to the heat and how the pathetic air conditioner (which I had installed, by the way, since Cat was confused with all the screws and directions) was not helping it _at all._

After one too many peeks at Cat which I hadn't exactly authorized my eyes to take, I huffed and spun on the couch so my back was to her and my feet were up. I had no control over myself, and it wasn't a good feeling. It _must_ have been the heat - there was no other explanation.

Cat had been rummaging in the kitchen and messing with the toaster, so she hadn't noticed my internal struggle. She was cooking something, and it smelt _good. _Like meat. My mouth was watering. I was nearly drooling.

Regardless, I didn't feel inclined to get up and steal it from her or to voice my desire for whatever she was making. I didn't even have the energy to twist my head around and look at what exactly it was. I just settled with groaning loudly and repeatedly, trying to describe how uncomfortable the heat made me with as little effort and diction as possible.

At the first noise Cat gave out the cutest little giggle, but after a few more she suddenly appeared by the side of the couch and straddled me, looking panicked.

I coughed when she plopped onto my stomach without holding back, grasping my shoulders and shaking them a bit. "Sam, are you okay?!" she gasped out quickly.

I gaped for a couple seconds, but it morphed into a look of confusion. "Um… yeah, Cat. Why wouldn't I be?"

She let out a huge sigh, deflating and leaning back on me - and action that, admittedly, sent a strong jolt through my body and left me without breath. I tried to conceal it and I doubt she noticed - after all, she went off rambling about how her brother made the same types of noises once, and it had ended with a hospital visit.

Although it was probably a good thing she hadn't noticed my emotional jumpstart, I was still confused by it. Actually, I had no idea what the hell had happened. I was shocked. I had never felt something so raw and… well, exhilarating. I had no idea how to describe it or, for that matter, what to attribute it to.

I wanted to kiss her.

I wanted to kiss her so badly it almost hurt me not to, and that shocked me. It shocked me and scared me a little, because I hadn't really thought it strange how attached and protective I felt over her right from the get go. It was almost, dare I say it, more intense than it ever was with Carly, but it still felt perfectly natural.

Cat was still rambling about her brother. Without giving her the chance to get off of me I stood up and took a step away from the couch, still a little scared but not allowing it to show. Cat naturally fell off of me and awkwardly rolled onto the floor, but the whole time she kept her story going and she got up as if it was perfectly normal.

"Anyway, the nurse was pretty upset about it - but, well, I suppose anyone would be. And it isn't exactly her job to clean that up. I do feel bad for her - but the bear, I heard he was returned to the wild safely, and I guess that's really all you can ask for for a happy ending, right Sammy?" She smiled at me, walking passed and pushing me down on the couch as she did so, something I began to protest against but stopped when I was seated. Too much effort.

Cat skipped toward the kitchen, humming, and though I was still very confused and a tad bit upset I watched her and had to let a little smile escape as I fell on the couch again. "Don't call me Sammy," I mumbled, knowing very well I should have been more opposed to it than I was.

Cat tried out various pet names while she returned from the kitchen (holding a sandwich), all of which I objected to. These included, "Sam-miester," "S-Dizzle," "Spuckett," and "Sam-I-Am." She had just begun to stray from my name and suggest that she call me by the names of animals (Honey-bear, Tree Frog, Antelope) when she took a seat on my legs and shoved a plate in my face. Yes, she sat _on_ my legs. She didn't move them or sit next to them (not that there was room). I would have made her move but I was too interested in the plate to care.

By instinct I held the plate and then looked at what was on it. It was the bagel I'd told her I was looking at before… covered in ham and melted cheese in perfect sandwich-like fashion. It was like a ham and cheese melt, but on a bagel. It was genius. It was heaven. The girl may be a little dull in the way of common sense, but she _knows_ how to cook. I devoured it immediately and she watched me, smiling carelessly.

After I had finished (it didn't take too long) and had efficiently moaned out my approval, I closed my eyes and leaned back against the armrest, ready for a nap. "Cat, not that I'm complaining, but why'd you give that to me?" I mumbled lazily.

I could hear the smile in her voice as she said, "Well, I thought you might be hungry, and I know you wanted that bagel, and I wanted to make you happy because I like it when you're happy."

I tried to hold it back, I really did - after all I do have a reputation, and I am not a sap. As a matter of fact most people I know would be _afraid_ to say something like that to me considering just how much I'm not a sap. I couldn't help it. I smiled pretty widely, and may have even blushed a little bit (_again, _dammit) and there was no way to hide it from her.

When she saw my reaction she burst into a fit of giggles and launched onto me in a strange hug. "Aw, Sammmmm," she said adoringly.

"Hey," I muttered beneath her, trying to regain dignity. "I thought you knew that I'm not a hugger. Plus, it's like two-hundred degrees out, I don't need your body heat." To be honest, I actually don't mind it when she hugs me, but it makes me feel strange and I don't know what to do about it.

Cat giggled again, not offended in the least, and jumped off of me all excited. "We should go to the pool!" she yelped, jumping up and down. "Sam, pleaseeee?" She pouted. It was the cutest fucking thing I've seen in my life.

"Cat," I started warningly. "We don't have a pool. And I don't do community pools."

She pouted deeper and grasped my hand, holding it in hers. My heart jumped up into my throat.

I cleared my throat. "… Fine," I murmured.

I don't even have a bathing suit.


	2. Doing Illegal Things

I told her I didn't have a bathing suit, but this didn't seem to concern her - as a matter of fact she seemed to become excited and jumped up to run towards her room. I followed her, though it probably wasn't her intention for me to since she slammed into me on her way back out the doorway. She was carrying bundles of colorful fabric, the shape of which I couldn't distinguish.

"Cat," I started, getting a hunch as to what this fabric was. "I will not wear these. I would rather be buried alive."

Cat's face fell a little, which gave me just a little pang in my heart, but this time I gave an attempt to ignore it. I was _not_ going to stray from my decision. I am still Sam Puckett. I do not wear pink if I can help it, a color which seems to primarily dominate her wardrobe.

"Aw, but Sam…," she whined, spreading the bathing suits out on the couch, some of which were missing their matching tops. Others looked suspiciously more like underwear. "They're so pretty! And I bet you'd look pretty in them, too." Then Cat sort of backtracked a bit, a blush surfacing on her cheeks. "I mean, you'd look pretty anyways, of course. You'd look pretty in anything, or even in nothing."

At this comment, my eyes involuntarily snapped up to search for hers with my eyebrows raised.

Cat didn't seem to show any sign of registering her own words, but she did go into a completely unrelated story immediately as if to cover it up. There was no sign of embarrassment on her face that I could see, though I got the feeling that perhaps she was just very good at hiding it - after all, she wouldn't look me in the eye and instead stared at her bathing suits and burst into a story that was unable to be connected to the situation in even in the shiftiest way possible.

I decided to let the incident go and interrupt her rambling (something about her teacher's resemblance to her uncle, and how they might be distant cousins, and, "Oh, Sam, wouldn't that be strange?").

In the middle of it I grabbed one of the safest-looking bathing suits and turned to rummage through a bag behind the couch. I pulled out a bottle of black spray-paint and strode to the door before she realized I had stopped listening.

"Sam, what are you…," she started, but I was already out the door. "Aw, you left," she said, though I could still hear her from my position at our neighbor's door.

I heard her footsteps approach as I knocked on the door and awaited an answer. Cat came up behind me, being inquisitive, but I ignored her questions. No one came to the door, which was what I had hoped would happen, and so I held the bikini top up to the door and sprayed it down. When I took it off the door its outline was there in black, and I flipped it over and did the same thing to its other side, then switched to the bikini top higher up on the door. I was going for an abstract look to soften the blow to the tenant who owned the apartment.

Cat, confused, spent the whole process protesting both at the ruining of her bathing suit and my "immoral" actions. I also ignored this just as well as I had the questions. Without so much as muttering a response to her I reentered our place and went to the sink, washing out the excess paint. As I had expected, the bathing suit remained black. I smiled at my handiwork, and then up at Cat.

She was still muttering the same protests, not phased in the least by the fact that the deed was already done and I hadn't been giving her the slightest acknowledgement. I got a little twitch of regret at this, but I suppressed it immediately and interrupted her again by saying, "See now, that wasn't so bad, was it?"

About half an hour later the top of a full head of red hair could be seen poking hesitantly over a wooden fence which enclosed a nicely designed in-ground pool. Cat stood on her toes beside me, peeking over the fence nervously and biting her lip. I let out a little smirk at this - not because it was cute, but… okay, so I thought it was cute.

After a pause in which I watched her attempt to get somewhere to place her foot on the fence, I expertly hopped over it. I landed on the other side with a little bend of the knees and a few steps to keep my balance (it was a surprisingly tall fence).

I waited a couple moments before turning back to the fence. "Cat?" I called over to her. "Are you gonna come join me?"

"Yeah," she squeaked. "I'll be over in a moment." This was followed by a few scratching noises against the fence, and then a couple unidentified noises. After a minute or two Cat plummeted over the fence and landed directly on her back on the grass below it with a thud.

I immediately flew down with my hand on her shoulder and frantically asked if she was alright.

Cat just began to laugh hysterically, which, after a bit, included rolling around, which didn't seem to cause her pain and so I assumed she was okay. She bursted into small fits of giggles which I observed with a little grin on my face that I tried desperately to hide.

I am fully aware that this is not the usual entrance to a community pool. This is because, no, Cat and I did not go to a community pool that day. Instead, after allowing my new bathing suit to dry, we headed directly across the street to a house I had been observing for a few days. The occupants were clearly on vacation (or fugitives), since the usual car had not been parked in the driveway for a few days.

Knowing that this home had a pool (don't wonder how I knew), I took this ideal opportunity to bring Cat swimming in a more private, less disgusting environment. Even though it involved breaking and entering. They didn't need to know.

Of course, I managed to convince Cat pretty easily that I had gotten permission.

There we were in a nice little private pool area in the sweltering heat. I don't care if I had to break the law, it was like a million degrees.

We stripped down to our bathing suits (I tried to avoid looking at Cat for too long) and I was the first to jump in.


	3. Being Lame

It felt absolutely fantastic. From the first impact the water made on my body, consuming it, to opening my eyes underwater after feeling a splash above me. Cat had jumped in right behind me and was in front of me, her body facing me straight on because I'd spun in the air. She was smiling so peacefully, her eyes closed and her face relaxed. Small bubbles fluttered from her nose and her hair blew around her face in the most beautiful swirls I've ever seen.

The feelings stirring in the pit of my stomach nearly made me forget that I had to get to the surface and _breathe._ As a matter of fact, had instinct not taken over I would have literally just drowned.

I surfaced, panting for air, and Cat came up beside me, gasping and giggling. I smiled at this, and noticed the droplets of water running down her skin. The way her hair stuck to her neck until it breached the surface of the water and flowed out in different directions, the way she smiled and bobbed a bit as she treaded water.

I was staring again and, realizing this, I swam to the edge just to distract myself. Cat followed, though, and we breathed deeply and felt free together while holding to the side.

Suddenly there was no denying it. I was attracted to Cat. From the beginning, probably - I just hadn't realized it till then. She roused some emotions I hadn't felt before, and others that I hadn't felt in way too long.

I wondered for a bit what this would mean for us, but then I decided against thinking. I've always been irresponsible and let things pan out on their own. Why stop now?

We giggled and jumped around like children. It was pretty disgusting. I was fully aware of this as it happened, but decided to let go of my pride for a moment since Cat was the only one really there to see me. She probably wouldn't remember in like five minutes, anyway, and if she did I didn't exactly mind as much as I knew I should have.

Cat swam in circles and looked me directly in the eyes more often than usual. I smiled more than usual, and even laughed at a few of the things she said - not just chuckled a bit, but _laughed._

She tried to convince me to race her, and when I told her I wouldn't she raced me anyway. Which means she swam to the other side, turned around and told me she'd won. That made me smile, too, although my competitive side flared up a little. I ignored it and pushed it down.

Cat showed me a couple things I hadn't really done before, like underwater tea-parties, and this odd way of floating to the bottom of the deep end. She took on a serious tone at one point and said, "Sam, if you're ever drowning, don't breathe out all your air underwater. Air floats."

I could see that she was very serious, nearly worried, but I couldn't hold back a little laugh at it. She smiled, too, though I didn't expect her to. "I know, Cat," I responded. "I wasn't planning on it."

She held up her pinky and raised an eyebrow. This took another laugh from me, though I rolled my eyes, too. I should have been more irritated. I wasn't.

I grasped her pinky with mine and winked. She blushed a little, and I felt a bubble of pride stir inside of me at her reaction, but she let go of my hand and flung herself backwards to the other side.

"Let's play Dolphin!" Cat called excitedly after a while longer of handstands and backflips.

I raised an eyebrow again and approached her in the shallow end. "Dolphin?" I started. "Never heard of it."

Cat pouted and swam over to the stairs, which she sat on. I followed but stayed in the water, standing on my knees in front of her. "You've never played Dolphin?" she asked, disappointed.

I shrugged, moving to the edge to get a grip on it. "Nope. I dunno. Haven't been in many pools. People tend to think I'll break things. Or people." I smirked. Memories.

Cat frowned deeper, walking over to me. "Aw…," she cooed. "But it's so fun! Like Monopoly!" She smiled brightly at this, grasping my hand.

I glanced at my hand, not exactly against the contact but confused by it none the less. "Uh…," I started hesitantly, unsure of how to ask. I decided to ignore it and looked back at her eyes, which were anticipating my response. "Monopoly sucks."

Cat giggled, pulling me by the hand toward the stairs. "Oh, Sam, you're so funny," she said.

"But," I began. "It wasn't exactly a jo -"

"Okay," she cut me off, which earned her a little glare she didn't bother to look at. "This is the owner's house," she explained, gesturing to the stairs. "And the shallow end is the dolphin's pool. The deep end is the ocean. I'll be the owner, which makes you the dolphin."

I shrugged, and asked, "Okay, but how do you play? I mean, what am I supposed to do?"

Cat gave me a stern look. "Sam," she scolded. "Dolphins don't talk."

I was confused, and probably looked it. "So… what noises do they make then…?" I pondered aloud.

"Squeaks," Cat said certainly, as if that was descriptive. "And, go!"

Oh, God.

**A/N - OKAY. So I ignored the whole Author's Note thing for two chapters so I wouldn't have to be original.**

**I'm back. It's been a rough year so I need to reshape my sense of humor and my skills. Also I need to distract myself. So my therapist (father) says.**

**My mental health was in jeopardy (welp, it always has been, but this year I told people about my dark, mysterious past I would rather not post directly to the internet (PM me, I'll be happy to vent to a perfect stranger), and also had my heart broken roughly about three times. Then I broke my toe. Then I sort of accidentally broke my family. **

**It's okay, don't pity me, I "just want attention" (according to Daddy, Mr. "Yeah-Your-Trauma-From-Abuse-IT'S-NOT-A-BIG-DEAL). **

**Yes, there's a little resentment there. I'm good.**

**Anywho, this isn't about me and my issues, although on a side note I should start a vlog (no one would watch it).**

**Point is I'm backkkkk a little (said that four paragraphs ago). I'll do this one.**

**So review. Review if you like it, review if you hate it, review if you didn't read it. Doesn't matter to me, just review. I'm a review whore. Go on, now. Do it. I'll love you forever.**


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